I'll take "Where the hell did THAT come from" for $200, Alex

And the answer is: "Sit in front of the computer at midnight eating half a pint of Ben & Jerry's."

Question: "What is something I thought I would never do again?"

"What the fuck is the matter with you?" also would have been accepted.

In my defense, I've been very good for the past 3 days, using less than 5 flexpoints. Usually by this time in the week, I'm running a negative balance, so even with the ice cream I'm still doing better than most recent weeks.

As for the why, I think I can narrow it down to two reasons...frustration, and the notion that junk begets junk.

As I mentioned, I've been eating beautifully for the past few days. I've also been working out every day since Monday. And every day since Sunday, I've been heavier. 186.5 on Sunday, 187 on Monday, 188 on Tuesday & Wednesday, and a terrifying 189 this morning. (Yeah, weighing every day = bad, blah-blah, don't care.) This during a week that I've eaten less and exercised more than any other week in the past two months. I know I said that this was about getting healthier, and less about the scale, and I do mean that...but damn. Could the scale maybe validate me just a little bit, please?!

And the second reason was sort of a re-revelation for me. It's something I've noted before, but it seems that what I eat for breakfast determines how the whole day's eating will be.

On Monday and Tuesday, I started with cheerios. Cheerios begat salads and Lean Cuisines, which begat healthy recipes cooked at home. Yesterday I started out the day with coffee and a Kashi granola bar (which is not bad as a snack, and not unhealthy...just not breakfast material). By 11 am, I was seriously hungry, so I went to Chipotle. I skimped on the rice and ordered chicken, but it still was a good 15-20 point meal. On the way home, fish sounded like a good dinner, but then Rob didn't want fish. So I bought hot dogs. And chips. And baked beans. And, of course, a pint of Primary Berry Graham. By the time dinner was over, the damage was mostly done. Ice cream at midnight just seemed like a natural progression.

So, what have I learned? a) As much as I would like to be able to ignore the scale, it matters to me, and b) eat a decent breakfast, fer chrissakes.

ha! your entry just made me really really hungry ;)

fer chrissakes, have your hub hide your scale from you until your weigh-in you daft woman! (not like I don't weigh myself everyday)

and perhaps the wendie plan might do well with you - I just started this past week!

yeah, it is weird when do something self-destructive that is out of character, only to realize you used to do it ALL THE TIME...you can take it in a fuck, I'm backsliding kinda way, but you can also take it as a hey, what is now an abberation used to be a norm. To draw an analogy, a political science professor recently pointed out to me that killing civilians in the context of battle used to be a global norm, even desirable. now, sure, we kill civilians, but we're not TRYING to. Likewise, (not to compare your dieting woes to war!) you make mistakes, but as long as you learn lessons from them (as you seem to be doing) perhaps they are worth making.

that's a good point, karin. Definitely another valid way to look at it. :)