the depths of my coffee pathology, and also some goals

So, the Keurig shipped yesterday, and I've been obsessively tracking the package ever since. It started in Chattanooga yesterday, and now it's in Memphis. It's supposed to be at the house on Friday (and heaven help UPS if it isn't). In the meantime, I've been scouring the Internet for a suitable travel mug to carry coffee to work. A pink one. Pink brushed aluminum would be ideal, but maybe some sort of translucent plastic would be okay. And if it could keep the coffee hot, that would be great too...but mostly I'd just like it to be pink.

(I'm telling you, these are the sorts of thoughts and missions that consume hours of my day...I must have a pretty good life. Either that, or I'm the most boring person in the universe.)

So, well, that hiatus/vacation/not posting thing really didn't pan out, did it? It's always amazing to me how much I suddenly have to say once I tell people I don't have anything more to say. I think it's the same phenomenon that causes me to leave the house roughly 87 times every morning. I get to the car...forgot the keys! Back in, get the keys...forgot the cell phone! Am I wearing my badge? No? Back in then. Halfway down the street, I can't remember if I locked the door...back I go. It's a miracle I get anywhere on time (mostly I don't).

I'm not sure what's going to come of this journal in this year. I've been reading around some of the new weight loss blogs that cropped up with the new year, and it was good for me to remember what it was like in my own beginning. The excitement, the hope, the optimism, the new recognition of my own habits...even the "d'oh!" moments. It's inspiring to watch someone else traveling the same bit of road I did 2 years ago, and overcoming the same obstacles with the same wonder that I did. And it's hard to realize that I lost that enthusiasm somewhere along the way.

But enough of that...here we are in year three of my own journey. My goals are different this year than they have been in the previous two. I don't really care whether I reach a goal weight. I'm not interested in being a size 8, having six-pack abs, going to the beach without a coverup, bouncing quarters off my ass, making ex-boyfriends rue the day, standing on rooftops and yelling "see? SEE?! I dare you to moo at me now, Home Depot stockboy. I fucking DARE you."*

I'd like to say that I'm a bigger person than that now, but I'm really not. I'd still like to get there eventually, just to show everyone (including myself) that I can, dammit. But I'm really more concerned with getting my body back to a normal cycle again so we can have some hope of conceiving, and losing weight is part of that. Basically, I want to lose enough weight so that I can get pregnant and gain it all back. :)

So, while pregnancy is my ultimate goal this year, here are some other things I would like to accomplish in 2005:

- Qualify for my company fitness incentive at least ONE quarter.

- Bike a century (100 miles). (I stole this goal from Mo, but it's a good one.)

- Bike more with Noah, so that we can do 10-20 mile rides as a family eventually, and so that he's more fit in general.

- Run a 5k.

- Exercise daily.

- Stop procrastinating so much.

- Oh yeah, lose some weight. I'm hoping for around 20 lbs, but if I accomplish every other thing on this list, then I'll be happy with whatever number it turns out to be.

So there it is. A lot more focus on health/self improvement, less on the scale. I'm hopeful that this will be a better approach than the number-centric 2004.

Here's to a healthier 2005!

*yes, someone really did moo at me at Home Depot a few years ago. I didn't shop at Home Depot for over a year after that, and I still don't if there's another option available. It was a small thing, and I know I should just get over it, but, well, you know.

I had a pink travel mug from Target. I can't find it on the web, but it was definitely pink.

A pink one would be cool! I'm a Starbucks tumbler whore myself. :)

*nod* I looked around at Starbucks this morning, but they had no pink. They had a blue bottle thing that looked promising (and was on clearance for $8), but it was one of those thermos things that you can't just drink out of. And the leather outer part had to be removed prior to washing. Now, I could tell myself that I could deal with that, but the reality is that the thing would lie on the floor of the car half-full of cold coffee for weeks before I would get up enough ambition to take the cover off and throw it in the dishwasher. So I didn't buy it.

I did buy this, though...and we don't even have Caribou Coffee down here. But look--pink translucent plastic! Steel! And since I'm from the midwest originally, having a Caribou mug will almost make me feel at home, right? I would have preferred a handle, but hey.

The runner-up didn't have a handle either, and it was twice as expensive, so Caribou won.:)

(Though I'm tempted to buy the runner-up in apple green.)