The post in which I, once again, employ lines of asterisks because I'm too lazy to use transitions

So, I suspect that I have lost whatever meager writing ability I used to have. I'm not really sure why this happened, or that I even care that it did, but lately I haven't been able to string 3 words together in a way that makes sense to anyone but me. And sometimes not even me.

Rob is the scale-hiding champion of the world. I begged him for days to take it out for me before the first of the month, and he was all iron will. It appeared yesterday morning before I woke up, and it was gone this morning when I woke up. If I didn't know it was him (since I asked him to do it), I'd think I have a magical disappearing scale. It's driving me crazy, but also keeping me from making myself crazy.

The other day, I saw a book on someone's coffee table called "PCOS Diet Book". So I wrote down the author and looked it up, then mentioned it to Rob. He offered to buy it for me, and I accepted. The nice thing about letting him buy the books is that he generally buys the book you request and about 65 others suggested to him by the amazon bot. So I am now in possession of either 4 or 6 books about PCOS, including the one book that I wanted to read. He rules.

Anyway, I've been flipping through these books, and I'm seeing "insulin resistance" coming up a lot. PCOS is apparently either caused by insulin resistance or insulin resistance is a symptom of PCOS. The books are unclear on which...but the point is that I'm probably insulin resistant. And though I haven't even touched the PCOS diet book yet, I'm pretty sure I know what it's going to say--keep bloodsugar constant, blah blah, eat lots of small meals, blah blah, lose weight, blah.

This tells me what I already knew from trying the South Beach diet and the WW core plan--those sorts of diets work well for me, and I feel good while on them. So, deep down in my heart of hearts and brain of brains, I know that I should be trying to follow one of these diets right now. And yet, I can't seem to get motivated to do so. My biggest barrier to starting and/or sticking to one of these plans isn't unwillingness, or a dislike for any food on the list, or being a sugar fiend (though that does factor in a little), or even a deep and abiding love of bread...it's a question of groceries and housework. I eat out a lot. A LOT. It's a routine I've grown accustomed to, one that I enjoy. A routine that means I'm often scrounging lunch money from the cushions of the couch on the day before payday. Eating out 10 times/week is expensive, dude.

I know that many, many aspects of my life would be better if we planned ahead, bought groceries, took lunch to work, and ate at home regularly, and that doing these things would make it very easy to follow a whole foods, low-refined-sugars, high-fiber diet. And yet, the thought of buying groceries more than 2 days at a time and doing the cooking and the cleaning and the planning...it all but gives me hives. For some reason, spending $10 on lunch at a restaurant seems, like, SOO much more economical than spending that same $10 on some fresh veggies and meat for a meal for three at home (when you pair it with the $50 spent on 3 other meals in the same shopping trip).

However, I think the time has come. Experience says so, my budget says so, WW says so, and now all my PCOS books say so. It's time to choose health over convenience. It's long since past time, actually.

I haven't been to the gym all week, or really done any exercising at all since the bike ride on Saturday. I know that I should go move my body somehow, and that if I don't get it back into the routine pretty soon, I'll stop exercising altogether. The crazy thing is, I also know that if I actually go to the gym, I'll be glad I went and want to go again. It's just getting my ass out of the chair that's the big challenge, really.

Let's see...I covered what I haven't been doing, what Rob has been doing, what I've been reading, what I should be doing, what I want to do...I guess that's it.

I'll get less boring eventually, I promise. I'm sort of in a funk.