ow.

I have discovered my personal hell. It's dark, and there are countless rows of stationary bikes. I am 207 lbs. and out of shape, and I am stuck in a cycling class for all eternity.

There's a crazy instructor at the front of the room, singing to the music and making groaning noises into the microphone every so often. Then he shouts things like "UP THIS TIME! Level 8 exertion! PUSH IT! 30 seconds! 45 seconds! GO!"

Then the other participants start chiming in with grunts and loud shouting groans, to which the crazyman replies "YES! I know! You can do it!"

Meanwhile, there I am in the back of the room, trying not to pass out, trying not to fall over when doing the "off the seat" stuff, wondering why the hell I ever thought a cycling class was a good idea. After 35 minutes, my heart explodes.

And then I start all over again.

(Good thing I stopped at 30 minutes this morning. But I'm determined to be able to go the full hour by the end of the year.)